


like a flower knows the rain

by carryokee



Category: Hit the Floor (TV), Real Person Fiction, Sports RPF
Genre: Crack, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Game Shows, Humor, M/M, Schmoop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:08:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21892660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carryokee/pseuds/carryokee
Summary: Jude and Zero represent the L.A. Devils in a celebrity Newlywed Game.
Relationships: Jude Kinkade/Zero | Gideon
Comments: 35
Kudos: 293





	like a flower knows the rain

**Author's Note:**

> This was meant to be cracky and turned a little schmoopy and...yeah. I don't know, either. But here it is, out of my system and into the void.
> 
> There are several real people portrayed in this fic. The only things I borrowed were their names and teams (or show). Their SOs in this story are entirely fictional. Some of them aren't even married IRL, but they are here.
> 
> Title from "Nobody Knows Me Like You Do" by Jennifer Brown.

“Absolutely not,” Jude says.

“Sure, why not?” Zero says.

Michaela, the Devils’ new marketing director, smirks at them across the expanse of Jude’s desk. “This bodes well for your chances already,” she quips.

Jude looks up at Zero. “You can’t seriously want to do this,” he says.

Zero just shrugs. “It could be fun.”

Jude scowls up at him, feeling betrayed. “A sports celebrity newlywed game sounds fun to you?”

“It’s for charity,” Michaela says. “Whatever you win will go to benefit the charity of your choice.”

“See there, Jude?” Zero says, squeezing his shoulder. “It’s for charity.” He smiles. “Think of the children.”

Zero’s preferred charity supports local foster kids, and okay, yes, it’s a great cause. But seriously. They both make a shit ton of money, which they can and do donate any time they want. They don’t have to put themselves on display like _this_.

“What about Richardson and his wife?” Jude asks, looking back at Michaela. “She’s even pregnant. They’ll be disgustingly adorable. Think of the optics.” He knows he sounds a little desperate, but he can’t help it.

Michaela laughs. “Hmm, let’s see. Just another gorgeous heterosexual couple with a baby bump. In L.A.,” she says, pointedly. “Or the smoking hot captain of the L.A. Devils and his adorably buttoned-up executive husband.” She looks back and forth between them. “I know which optics _I_ prefer.”

“I prefer the optics where he’s _unbuttoned_ , personally,” Zero says. “Can he go like that?”

Jude shoots him a glare. “You,” he says, “are not helping.” He turns back to Michaela. He knows he’s already lost this argument, but says anyway, “Jelena—”

“Agrees with me,” Michaela interrupts.

Jude sighs. “Fine.”

Michaela grins. “Devils Nation,” she says, giving them both a wink. “Rise up. Good luck, boys.”

+++

When Jude shares with Zero the list of the other couples who have signed up to compete with them, he laughs. A little too much.

“What’s so funny?” Jude asks, suspicious.

“Jeff Carter,” he says, still smiling. “From the L.A. Kings.”

Jude narrows his eyes. “What about him?”

Zero lifts his eyebrows. “Well…”

Jude’s shoulders slump. “Shit,” he says. “Did you have sex with him?” He’s accepted the fact that Zero’s sexual history is extensive, but that doesn’t mean he likes hearing about it.

“No,” Zero says. “Well, not really.”

“Not really?”

“We made out once,” Zero explains. “When I was in Ohio. He was playing for the Blue Jackets at the time. We met at a charity thing, actually.”

“A charity thing.”

“Some kind of fundraiser for youth sports, I think,” Zero says. “Anyway, we both drank too much of the free booze and he groped me in the hall outside the men’s room.”

“And you thought, what the hell. And made out with him.” Jude just stares at him, waiting for him to continue.

“It was no big deal, Jude,” Zero says, shrugging. “He probably doesn’t even remember it, actually. It happened a million years ago. And we were really fucking drunk.”

“ _You_ remember it,” Jude points out.

Zero smiles. “That’s because I’m a gentleman and a scholar. It’s rude to forget the people who have had their tongue in your mouth.”

Jude just holds his gaze, shaking his head. You’d think he’d be used to Zero by now, but the man still finds a way to surprise him. Then he points to the list Zero’s still holding. “Anyone else on that list you’ve made out with?”

Zero looks back at the list, tipping one eyebrow up. “Well, actually…”

“Fucking _seriously_?” Jude says.

Zero laughs again. “Nope,” he says. “But you should see the look on your face.”

“Ha ha,” Jude says, smirking. “You are such an asshole.”

Zero drops the list on the coffee table, then crowds Jude into the arm of the couch. “Jealousy is a good look on you,” he says, voice low. He presses his mouth to Jude’s. “Let’s have sex.”

+++

The venue is the main ballroom of the Four Seasons Hotel in Beverly Hills. When Jude learns that people paid $1,000 just to watch this travesty in person when they could watch it live streaming from home for a $24.95 pay-per-view fee on YouTube (or, better yet, not watch it at all for free), he’s reminded once again how some people have more money than common sense.

He reminds himself once again that this is for charity.

He and Zero walk the gauntlet of paps and reporters as they make their way inside. Zero picked out their clothes for this event, so of course Jude’s not wearing a tie, much to his chagrin. He’s always kind of viewed his ties as armor. He feels like he could use some armor now. He’s never been comfortable in the spotlight and he’s feeling a little itchy. He wants to take Zero’s hand, but that’s not really their style.

“Do you think you guys will win?” one of the reporters asks. “You seem to have a lot of supporters here.”

Zero looks at her. “It’s not about winning,” he says serenely, straight-faced. “It’s about raising as much money as possible to support the foster kids program here in L.A.” Then he leans in, smiling. “But that doesn’t mean we don’t _want_ to win,” he adds, winking. 

+++

Jude’s never met Cody Bellinger before, but as the recently crowned National League’s Most Valuable Player, he’s seen the Dodger outfielder’s picture plastered all over the city.

Cody shakes their hands. “I played basketball in high school,” he says, and Jude has to stop his eyes from rolling because if he had a dollar for every time someone said that to Zero, they could wallpaper their house with them.

Zero just smiles. “I’ve never played baseball,” he says smoothly. “Too boring.” He deliberately eyes Cody up and down. “But maybe we could play a little one-on-one sometime.” He stares at Cody’s crotch. “Or a game of HORSE,” he amends, smiling up at him.

Jude has to suppress a groan because he knows what Zero’s doing.

Cody shifts uncomfortably, clearing his throat. “Yeah, um. Sure,” he mutters. He looks around quickly, eyes darting around the large room. “I should go find my wife. It was nice meeting you.”

Zero chuckles as he watches Cody walk away and Jude elbows him in the ribs. “You’re shameless,” he says.

Zero looks over at him and grins. “Ninety percent of competition is psychological. If you can shake ’em up a little, you can gain the advantage.”

Jude rolls his eyes. “It’s the Newlywed Game, Gideon. For _charity_. Not Game 7 of the NBA Finals.”

“Still true, though,” Zero says, leaning in closer. “We’ve got this in the _bag_.”

+++

Jeff Carter laughs when he sees them. “Zero, you motherfucker,” he says amiably, his arm around a pretty, petite woman with dark brown hair and big blue eyes whom he introduces as his wife Jessica. “I can’t believe we’ve found ourselves at another charity event together. Small world, eh?”

Jude feels himself tense, even though he knows he’s being ridiculous. Zero looks perfectly placid and he knows damn well he has no reason to be jealous. But fuck if he isn’t anyway, just a little.

Zero smiles. “Microscopic,” he says, holding out his hand. “I wasn’t sure you’d even remember.”

Jeff shakes Zero’s hand, then laughs again. “Of course I remember. When I saw your name on the list, I laughed so hard, I just had to tell Jess what happened.”

“You mean how you made out with my husband outside a men's room in Ohio?” Jude blurts out. The words tumble out before he can stop them and he stands there, mortified, as his face heats up. He hears Zero snort out a laugh, can feel his gaze on the side of his face.

Jeff’s eyes go wide. “Well, yeah, actually.” He shakes his head, dragging his hand down his face. “Christ, I was drunk.” He leans in closer to Jude. “I’m glad to see you’ve made an honest man out of him.” He smirks over at Zero. “Someone needed to.”

Zero chuckles, then leans in and brushes a kiss across Jessica’s cheek. “I hope for your sake,” he says softly to her, “your husband’s improved his technique. Kissing him was like being swallowed by a jellyfish.” He looks up at Jeff and smiles. “Good luck today.”

+++

Tyler Higbee of the L.A. Rams is a solid wall of muscle with perfectly tousled dark hair and warm brown eyes that scrunch up a little when he smiles. Jude is immediately, embarrassingly, smitten, and from the knowing half-smile and mischievous twinkle in his eyes, Zero fucking well knows it.

“So,” Zero says. “Is tight end your position or a physical description?”

Tyler laughs. He looks at Jude, pointing over at Zero. “Is he like this with everyone?”

Jude’s mouth is dry, but he manages to say, “I’d like to say no, but—”

“It’s just one of my charms,” Zero interrupts. “Of which there are many.” He’s grinning. “Right, babe?”

Jude gives him a look. _Babe?_ Zero never calls him that.

“Funny,” Jude says, gritting his teeth. “Right now I can’t think of a single one.”

Tyler looks back and forth between them, a tiny smile on his lips. “How long have you two been married?” He’s looking at Jude.

“About six months,” Jude says. “You?”

Tyler smiles. “Barely a month, actually. Which is why I didn’t think Tara and I should have to be the ones to do this.” He looks exasperated. “I suggested Cooks and his wife. They’re having a baby and I thought it would make a more marketable image. You know, brand new family and all that.”

Jude laughs. “I tried that, too.” He motions to Zero, shrugging. “But here we are.”

“Yeah,” Tyler says, grinning. “Here we are. My wife thought it would be fun. Plus, you know, it’s for charity.”

“Sorry about the Super Bowl,” Zero says abruptly.

Tyler looks over at him. “Yeah,” he says. “Thanks.”

“It must suck to lose a championship,” Zero says. “Of course, I wouldn’t know.” He smiles. “The first one was amazing. But the second one? Even better.” He reaches up and pats Tyler on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. I’m sure you’ll get there,” he says. “Though probably not this year.” He puts his hand on the small of Jude’s back. “Excuse us.”

Jude can hear Tyler’s laugh as they walk away.

+++

According to his brief bio, Sebastian Lletget is a midfielder for the L.A. Galaxy. Whatever that means. Jude knows nothing about soccer.

He and Zero meet him right before they’re all about to go on stage to start the game.

“I didn’t even know L.A. had a soccer team,” Zero says, smiling.

Jude really does roll his eyes this time.

Sebastian just smiles. He’s holding the hand of his wife, a statuesque brunette with green eyes and a spray of light freckles across her nose. “When I saw who else was going to be here today, I was disappointed,” he says. “I’m more of a Clippers fan myself.”

Zero laughs. “Who are you, again?”

One corner of Sebastian’s mouth quirks up. “I’m the guy who’s just here to have a little fun, represent my team, and raise some money for cancer research.” He holds out his hand. “Good luck.”

Zero cuts Jude a quick glance before shaking Sebastian’s hand. “Yeah,” he says. “You, too.”

But as they turn to walk up the steps to the stage, he can’t help but add, “Be careful. I wouldn’t want you to stub your toes. I’m sure they’re very valuable.”

+++

Current real housewife of Beverly Hills, Lisa Rinna, is the host of this thing, and Jude knows that Zero is secretly fanboying his ass off about it. Their DVR is currently filled with multiple episodes of every RH show that Zero refuses to let Jude delete.

They’re seated right in the center of the stage, two couples on either side of them. Jude knows Michaela – and therefore, Jelena – is behind their placement. Of course they would both want the Devils’ team to be the center of everyone’s attention. As if being the only same-sex couple participating isn’t enough to make that happen.

The lights on the stage make it hard to see the audience, but if the size of the crowd milling around before the event was any indication, this thing is sold out. 

The theme music plays and a disembodied announcer introduces each couple, mentioning their chosen charity and sharing an anecdote about each couple’s engagement that presumably was shared by the couple themselves. He looks over at Zero. Since no one asked him to share anything, that means Zero must’ve offered something up. Which means that it could be, well, _anything_.

“What did—” Jude begins whispering fiercely.

“Shh,” Zero says, grinning. “Wait for it.”

The announcer’s voice introduces them. “Our next contestants are here representing the Los Angeles Devils and raising money to improve the lives of local foster children through sports and education. Jude and Zero have been married for 6 months. According to Zero, when Jude proposed, he spelled out the words ‘marry me’ with Cheerios across their breakfast bar.”

Jude rolls his eyes at Zero. “You are so full of shit,” he whispers. That’s not how it happened at all.

Zero just laughs. “Did you want me to tell them the truth?”

Considering the truth involved a lot less breakfast cereal and lot more nudity, probably not.

+++

Lisa Rinna is introduced to a hearty round of applause, greeting the audience before turning her attention to the contestants. She explains the rules. One round of five questions worth $5,000 each, a second round of five questions worth $10,000 each, then a two-part final bonus question worth $25,000. Everyone’s winnings will be donated to their chosen charities, with the winning couple’s total doubled through matching funds from the event’s sponsors.

Then Zero is escorted offstage with the wives from the other couples and Jude suppresses a smile. _Good ol’ wifey_ , he thinks.

+++

**Round One**

Zero makes a point to offer a hand to all the women when they return to the stage. Then he sits back down next to Jude, his knee pressed to Jude’s like it usually is when they’re sitting this close. It’s as close to PDA as they usually get.

Lisa starts them off. “Okay,” she says. “We asked your husbands to tell us how they’d think you’d answer a few simple questions. Some of the results, I must say, were…interesting, to say the least.” She pauses, smiling. “First question: When and where did you first kiss?”

The Bellingers start, with Katie ( _“Katie and Cody?” Zero had snarked. “Where did they meet, on the Disney Channel?”_ ) giving a weirdly specific answer that includes date, time, and a nearly GPS specific location.

They get it wrong and Katie pouts a little.

The Higbees get it right and share a high five, which…okay, sports people.

Then it’s Jude and Zero’s turn.

Zero looks at Jude, quirking one eyebrow up in a question. Jude just shrugs and smiles because this has always been a point of contention with them. He did, does, and always will think of that kiss in the limo as their first one. Their lips touched, therefore it counts.

Lisa repeats the question. Zero looks over at her. “Do you want the truth or Jude’s fictionalized version of it?”

The audience laughs. Jude just shakes his head.

“Well, he was supposed to tell us what he thought _you’d_ say,” she offers.

Zero looks at him again, studying his face, his lips twisting wryly. “Well, in that case…his apartment before a Devils team party.”

“Which you didn’t want me to go to because you were jealous,” Jude shares.

Zero laughs. “That’s true. I was.” More laughter from the audience.

“Jude, show us your answer,” Lisa says.

Jude holds up his blue card. In large block letters it says, “MY APARTMENT BEFORE A PARTY.”

Zero looks out at the audience and grins. “We never did make it to that party.”

Someone catcalls from somewhere in the ballroom. Jude feels his face heat up.

+++

“Next question,” Lisa says. “Who said ‘I love you’ first?”

“That’s easy,” Zero says. “Me.”

“By about five seconds,” Jude clarifies. But his blue card says, “ZERO.”

“Still first, though,” Zero replies.

+++

“Question number 3,” Lisa continues. “Who won the last argument the two of you had?”

Jessica Carter nearly shoves Jeff out of his chair when he answers it wrong. “I totally won our last argument,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Looks like you’re losing this one, too, Jeff,” Zero quips, and even the other contestants laugh.

The other three couples get it right.

“Zero?” Lisa says. “Your turn.”

He meets Jude’s eyes, raising his eyebrows, as they both share the memory of their last argument. Or rather, the memory of how it ended. They still haven’t replaced that picture frame.

“I did,” Zero says, smirking. “As usual.”

“ZERO,” says Jude’s blue card. Again. He meets Zero’s eyes. “But that’s because you cheat.”

“I’ve never heard you complain,” Zero says. He looks out at the audience, grinning. “When I cheat, we both win.”

“Oh, for fuck's sake,” someone mutters from onstage. Jude thinks it might be Bellinger.

+++

Camila Lletget says something in exasperated-sounding Spanish when her husband answers the next question with, “Black lace panties.”

“Your jersey, Sebastian,” she says, shaking her head. “You like it when I wear your jersey. _Idiota._ ”

The question is: “What’s your spouse’s favorite thing to see you wear?”

“My wedding ring,” Zero answers.

Jude holds up his blue card. “HIS WEDDING RING.”

The audience _awws_. 

“It goes especially well with my birthday suit,” Zero adds. Jude just rolls his eyes.

+++

“Okay,” Lisa says. “Final question of round one. What is your spouse’s favorite social media platform?”

“ _Facebook?_ ” Tara Higbee exclaims indignantly, grabbing the card from Tyler’s hands and smacking him over the head with it. “How old do you think I am?”

Jessica Carter and Katie Bellinger like Pinterest, Camila Lletget likes Snapchat.

Zero looks at Jude and smiles. Jude holds up his blue card to reveal the word INSTAGRAM just as Zero says it.

“Hashtag zudebathpic,” Zero adds, grinning out at the audience. “Twenty-eight million likes and counting.”

+++

**Round Two**

“You guys are really good at this,” Tyler Higbee says to Jude as they’re waiting in the sequestration room down the corridor.

Jude laughs, shrugging. “Don’t be too impressed. Those were easy questions.”

Tyler’s smile is rueful. “For you, maybe. But Tara is going to have my ass for getting two of them wrong.”

Jude smiles. “Facebook, though. Really? Even I knew that was wrong and I don’t even know her.”

Tyler winces, chuckling. “I know, I know. Facebook is my mom’s favorite. I can’t believe I said that. Just panicked, I guess.”

Jude holds out his hand. “Better luck in the next round,” he says.

On the way back to the ballroom, Jeff Carter pulls him aside. “Seriously, Jude,” he says. “That thing back in Ohio…it was nothing. I just want you to know that.”

Jude pauses before answering, scanning his face. “Not your fault,” he finally says, smiling. “Zero _is_ pretty fucking irresistible.”

+++

“The questions in this round are a little more challenging and therefore worth $10,000 each,” Lisa says after they’ve returned to the stage. “And I must say, guys, I wouldn’t mind being a fly on some of _your_ walls.”

There’s a brief delay before the audience laughs and Jude wonders if they’re being prompted.

“First question: What’s the one thing your spouse does that annoys you the most?”

Jude laughs out loud at this, unable to help himself. “Just one?”

Everyone laughs.

“Alright, then,” Lisa says. “How about we start with you, Jude?”

Jude looks over at Zero and smirks. “Well,” he says, lifting one eyebrow as he turns his eyes to Lisa. “He does this really annoying thing with his fingers. Especially when we’re in bed.”

The audience hoots and catcalls and Zero laughs.

Lisa’s expression turns wry. “I’m afraid you’ll need to be a bit more specific. But let’s keep it PG-13 or less, shall we?”

Jude looks out at the audience. If Zero can play to the crowd, so can he. “Well,” he says, “he…” He pauses for effect. “Cracks his knuckles.”

There’s a hum of disappointment from the audience.

Zero laughs as he holds up his blue card. It reads, “CRACK MY KNUCKLES.” 

“Gotta keep ’em limber,” he says to the audience. “You know, for _basketball_.”

Turns out, Cody Bellinger clips his toenails in bed (Jude and Zero make a face at each other at that), Jeff Carter leaves the empty OJ carton in the fridge, Tyler Higbee talks through movies, and Sebastian Lletget never puts the cap back on the toothpaste.

“Christ, we’re all so boring!” Zero wails.

+++

Round two, question two.

“What is the first thing you think the opposite sex notices about your spouse?”

Tyler Higbee: “My height.” Tara’s blue card: “HIS HEIGHT.” She squeals in delight and pulls him down (and down) for a kiss.

“Well,” Jude says when it’s their turn. “That depends. Is he wearing a shirt?”

The audience laughs.

When Lisa clarifies that the implication is that everyone is fully clothed in this scenario, Jude sighs dramatically. “In that case,” he says, “I would have to say his smile.”

The audience _awws_ again.

Zero flashes said smile as he holds up his blue card. “MY SMILE.”

+++

Lisa’s expression turns mischievous. “Alright, lovers,” she says a bit dramatically. “This next one’s a little naughty.”

The audience murmurs in anticipation.

“Where is the strangest place the two of you have made love?”

Jude nearly chokes on his tongue. Who approved this question? He meets Zero’s eyes, who just gazes serenely back at him.

Cody Bellinger looks over at his wife and grins. “Mom,” he says, “if you’re watching this…I’m sorry.” Katie’s giggling. “In the bathroom at my nana’s house during my grandparents’ 60th anniversary party.”

Katie’s face changes from laughing to furious in less than a second. Standing up, she screeches, “WHAT?! I’VE NEVER BEEN TO YOUR NANA’S HOUSE!” Then she proceeds to beat Cody with the remainder of her blue cards as he folds his arms over his head in protection. Then she storms off the stage, sobbing, with Cody chasing after her and the rest of the couples staring after them both.

“Oh, shit,” Jeff mutters to Jude’s left.

The audience is so quiet, all that can be heard are the soft sounds of feet shuffling and the muffled sounds of throats clearing.

“Well,” Zero says into the quiet, “I guess he won’t be rounding third any time soon.”

The entire ballroom erupts into relieved laughter as the bubble of tension suddenly bursts.

Lisa deftly brings them back to the game.

The Lletgets had sex in a lifeguard stand in Malibu. The Carters christened her little nephew’s sky fort, and the Higbees had sex on the Rams team bus.

“Jude?” Lisa says. “Care to share?”

Jude looks at Zero again. They’ve had a lot of sex in a lot of different places, but honestly, there’s really only one answer to this.

“The, uh,” he says, feeling himself blush. “The coat room during a masquerade party.”

As Zero holds up his blue card that reads, “COAT ROOM,” he adds for the audience, “Word of advice. If you’re ever in The Devil’s Playground, you may want to keep your coat on.”

+++

The Bellingers are officially out of the game, it seems, since they never returned to their seats.

“Complete this sentence,” Lisa says. “My spouse has more [blank] than anyone else I know.”

After the last question, this one is pretty tame.

“Shoes,” Sebastian says. Correct.

“Cookbooks,” Tyler answers. Correct.

“Attitude,” Jeff says, getting a dirty look from Jessica. Her blue card reads, “MAGAZINES.” She proceeds to smack him with it.

“See, what did I tell you?” he says to the audience, holding up his hands to a round of light laughter.

When it’s Jude’s turn, he points to Zero’s head. “Hair products.”

Zero laughs and holds up his blue card. “HAIR PRODUCTS.”

“Seriously,” Jude says to the audience. “It’s like living in the hair care aisle at Ulta Beauty.”

“Says the guy who keeps 50 tubes of Chapstick in the bedside table,” Zero retorts, smirking over at him.

Jude meets his eyes, says calmly, “I don't hear you complaining about the softness of my lips when I’m—”

“Great job, guys!” Lisa interrupts brightly.

+++

“Final question of the round,” Lisa announces. “This one could make or break some of your teams’ chances in the bonus round, so consider your answers carefully.

“Question: If you could change just one thing about your spouse, what would it be?”

Jude laughs. “I’m going to have to go with the hair again,” he says.

“MY HAIR,” reads Zero’s blue card. Looking out at the audience, Zero says, “Jude’s really into interior design. He hates that the carpet doesn’t match the drapes.”

“Too much information, dude,” Jeff mutters beside them as everyone else laughs.

+++

“Time for the bonus round!” Lisa exclaims cheerfully. “We asked both partners the same question earlier, saving their answers for this round. This question is worth $25,000. But there’s a catch. In order to win the money, both partners must answer the question correctly.

“So far, Team Devils has a perfect score. But the other teams aren’t far behind and could win it all if both partners get it right and either Jude or Zero answer wrong.

“So…let’s begin!”

She starts with the Higbees, who both answer correctly, bumping them up into third place, past the Lletgets.

Sebastian answers correctly while Camila does not, which leaves them to finish in fourth place.

The Carters both answer correctly, and for the first time all day, they’re in first place, ahead of Jude and Zero.

“Alright guys,” Lisa says, smiling over at them. “You’re currently in second place, but can win it all and a total of $200,000 for your charity if you both can answer this correctly. Here we go. You’ve both had some time to think about it now. Zero, I’m going to ask you first.

“What did Jude say is his favorite thing about you?”

Zero looks at him, a smile playing at his lips. Jude knows they’re on the same page on this, just like they are in most things. And even if what Zero’s about to say isn’t strictly Jude’s _favorite_ thing about him, it’s what they both know the audience wants to hear.

“My abs,” Zero says with his most obnoxious grin. 

Jude laughs and holds up his blue card. “HIS ABS.” He looks out at the audience. “I mean, you guys have seen them, right?”

Someone wolf whistles and the audience laughs.

“Alright, Jude,” Lisa says. “It comes down to you. What did Zero say is his favorite thing about you?”

Jude looks at Zero again and sees something shift in his eyes. Gone is the amusement, replaced with the softness Jude only ever sees when it’s just them, him and Gideon, the rest of the world forgotten. A memory suddenly surfaces.

_“The way you look at me, Jude,” Gideon says softly, skin glowing golden in the light from their bedside lamp. He brushes his knuckles lightly across Jude’s cheek. “It’s my favorite thing in the world.”_

Jude blinks, then clears his throat. “Uh,” he says, his voice slightly hoarse. “The way I look at him.”

Zero’s smile is sweet and delighted as he holds up his last blue card. It reads, “THE WAY HE LOOKS AT ME.”

The audience cheers, one of the wives says, “Oh my god, that’s so sweet!” and Zero is still just looking at him.

Jude can’t help but pull him in for a kiss.

+++

“Well, that was a complete success,” Michaela says on Monday. She’s smiling brightly at them across her desk, her tablet in her hands. “Your nauseatingly sweet performance on Saturday has given us a mountain of much-needed positive publicity. I’ve taken calls all morning from LGBT-friendly companies who want to sponsor us.”

“Not to mention all that money we made for charity,” Jude replies drolly. “That’s the most important part.”

She waves her hand dismissively. “Yes, yes, of course. Yay, you!” She holds out her tablet. “Look! You guys are a meme.”

Jude takes the tablet from her hand and gazes down at the screen. On it is a photo of him and Zero, a screen grab from the bonus round, the two of them smiling at each other over that final blue card.

Above their heads, in bold white lettering, it says, “May you find someone who looks at you the way Jude looks at Zero.”

Jude tips his head back and groans. 

Zero plucks the tablet from his hand, hooking his hand over the curve of Jude’s neck, the pad of his thumb rubbing up into Jude’s hair. “This one’s definitely going on Instagram,” he says.

Jude looks over at him, rolling his eyes. “Of course it is,” he says, resigned.

Zero grins, then presses a kiss to Jude’s cheek. “Hashtag relationshipgoals.”

The End

**Author's Note:**

> My apologies to Cody Bellinger. I'm sure he's a very nice person.
> 
> Also, you guys should see my search history for this fic. Seriously.


End file.
